Off The Rack

Why don't they make clothes for short, fat people? I'm tired of reading all of the Sunday ads and seeing only skinny tall people wearing mostly UGLY clothes. How hard can it be?! I mean, really- HOW HARD CAN IT BE?! I see lots of short, fat people everyday. They look uncomfortable. Probably because their clothes don't fit well. And what about nice clothes? I go shopping, and everything for bigger girls are in one color and make us look as big as the side of a barn. The prints are even worse. Are people really getting paid to design this crap?! Who wants to look like a cow, or some spotted whale? God help us when big girls wear Christmas prints. Snowflakes do not come in one size fits all. I'm just saying.

My real problem is no clothes for short, wide people. If you are short and have gut, butt, or boobs- you are SOL. If you are regular height, you can go to Lane Bryant or Fashion Bug. I've seen How To Feel Good Naked, I've seen The Biggest Loser. I know that there are more people out there that look like me in the places where they make clothes. If they really wanted to get the economy going, they should make a law that makes the people who make clothes make pretty, or at least tasteful clothes, for short, fat people. I know I would be stimulated!

I'm sick and tired of having to spend hours looking for something decent to wear at these stores, only to find a few things, but no cute outfits, and everything has to be altered. Why don't they just take all of the big, fat clothes, put them in one store, and have the alterations lady right there? And for God's sake, stop putting prints on the front of sweaters and shirts that make my boobs look like a strip mall. That's all.

Shut Up!

Do you know how much better off I would be if I would just shut up and not share what I really think? It just doesn't pay to share. People don't want to know what I really think! They'll say that want to know, but then they will always use what was said against you later. I'm so tired of hearing my words used against me that I'm just going to keep my mouth shut from now on. I don't want to fight about everything because some people can't handle the truth about themselves. Some people don't want to face that they say and do hurtful things, and always turn the blame around on you. Why can't they just shut up? Oh well, I guess that I will have to be the bigger person, and keep my mouth shut!

I know I'm Not Political, but...

Have you ever really looked at John McCain? Besides being really old (I mean really old), his arms make him look like some kind of dinosaur. I know that he is a war veteran and his arms were injured. I'm just not sure if he could even reach the button if he had to push it. Or, God forbid, there were 2 buttons he had to push at the same time!

This may be nasty, but how does he have sex? He's so short and she's so tall, and those arms... I just can't see how they get it done. I'm sure that they do, but she must be on top. If he tried to be on top- those arms of his were hurt. He couldn't be up there for long.

I really don't care much about these election things. I just can't see McCain becoming president with those arms. That's all.

Passing By

My BFF's dad just died. It seems sudden, but it was and it wasn't. He was getting up in years, and he just had a procedure that went okay. Basically, he died of dehydration. Who dies from that? It's so sad and my BFF is devastated. He let me come live with her family when I couldn't stay at home anymore. He always made me feel a part of their family. I feel bad that I hardly went by to see him or call him. I never knew my dad. He died when I was very young. I know so little about him because his family didn't want anything to do with me. I'm really not used to people dying.

I really don't know what to say to my BFF. What to you say when people die? I remember sitting next to my HuZzbend when he chose to turn off life support for his uncle. It was the best thing to do, but he still struggled to make the decision. We stayed in that hospital room waiting for him to die. That was so weird. He didn't really know his uncle, but he still wanted to be with him at the end. I remember my BFF who died in high school. I can still hear her voice and see her face even though she has been gone for so long. I still miss her.

How do we deal with death? It stresses me out even thinking about it. Still, I have to get ready. My BFF needs me to be strong to help her get through her dad's funeral.

I need clothes!

OMG! It is so hard for me to find any clothes being a short, juicy woman. My HuZzbend calls me juicy, it's fat. I could be alot worse, but I'm not petite enough for the petite, and I'm too short for the plus sizes. The sleeves are too tight or too long. The pants need to be low-rise, kinda like capris. Most coats and jackets look like dresses. Most shirts are too big, or too long. And everything that isn't for skinny chicks are just ugly. Nobody needs to wear big flower prints on their pants when they have a big butt with big legs. I have thick legs, but they are very short. If I want to wear something nice, like if I want to go out, I can never find a nice matching outfit that looks good on me.

I wear the same pants over and over, to the point that I wear them out. You know, in the crotch, or the back pocket rips. I have no shirts. In my work, I get so hot moving things around, or I freeze at different parts of the day. Why can't somebody make clothes for women like me? I see other women in the stores that have the same issues. Kinda long or short torsos. Pear shapes or big arms. Underwear that don't ride, slide or irritate me. A halfway decent bra that doesn't pinch or or poke. Socks that stay up. Comfortable shoes that don't give me stinky feet. Even some decent comfy clothes that don't hang down to my knees or make me look like a little turtle. Grrrr!

Would it be so hard to just make some nice clothes that fit poor, short, little me? And something not expensive! Clothes can cost so much money. Everytime I have a little money, I can never find any clothes. Then when I find something nice, I don't have any money- which is most of the time.

This weekend, I finally found some decent stuff. Mostly it's stuff to wear to work, but I want to look nice too. I get happy when I can catch a sale. Yea! We really didn't have the money, but I needed the clothes. I feel better now that I have some things to wear. Of course, a few things need to be altered, but that's better than having nothing. I wish I was skinny, so that I could wear all of those really cute clothes. The tops and the pants. I might even wear skirts and dresses, if I had longer legs. I wanna look cute too. That's all.

Working For The Weekend

It is almost Friday- Yea! I love weekends. I love sleeping in. I love getting all snuggled in the covers and just snoozing the morning away. And when I wake up, I want to smell coffee- and bacon. Oh, I love the smell of fresh coffee and bacon cooking on a Saturday morning. I can just curl up on the couch with a blanket and watch TV with my coffee and breakfast made for me. Yea! Waking up every morning is so hard. It seems like I just went to bed. My body is so achy and sore. I need my HuZzbend to give me a good scratch, but I know that he won't. If he really loved me, he would give me a scratch, make my coffee and serve me breakfast in bed. That would be so yummy!

Getting up to go to work is too hard. The kids are always bickering and screwing around instead of getting ready for school. The mornings are getting colder and I need to get a car with heated seats to keep me warm and toasty on my way to work. Weekends are all about sleeping in, and being warm and toasty and getting scratched. Is is so wrong to want my weekend? Work is so long, and by the time I get home, it's time to make dinner (maybe), eat, watch a little TV before I get sleepy, and go to bed. Sometimes, I just wanna stay in bed and sleep. Alright? That's all.

Being Married to A Difficult Man

I love my HuZzbend. He is a very talented and smart man. He is also very complicated and difficult to talk to. I try to show him that I care by checking up on him and asking him about his day. He doesn't like questions. How am I supposed to know how he's feeling or what is going on in his head if I don't ask him? The more questions that I ask, the more defensive he gets. Now there are times when he is very sweet and open. He likes to talk alot about things, politics and science and stuff. He asks me what I think, but I really don't know much about those things. He lets things build up inside of him until you ask him the wrong question- then he just goes off. He has so much going on in his mind, and I just want to take care of him, but he doesn't let me. He lets needy people (women) get close to him and add stress to his life trying to solve their problems. It is hard not to like my HuZzbend. He loves to talk to people and tell stories. He's good at that. He loves to be in front of people, but he only shows one side of himself. I would love to take care of him, but he needs to understand that my questions are my way of trying to understand him. He takes on too much by himself, and that worries me. He frustrates me when he gets angry at me for just trying to take care of him. I love my HuZzbend, but he is a difficult man to live with.

Poor, little white girl

Ugh!!!!!! I hate not having money. Is living above my means such a crime? OK, maybe it's not the smartest thing to do, but a girl has to have some fun. I like jewelery and new cars and clothes that fit me. What's so wrong with that? Every time Christmas shopping comes around, I want to have enough money to get gifts for my kids that they want. After Christmas, I don't want worry about paying the bills. That's all. I wanna shop online and bid on auctions. I wanna go to all of the garage sales and buy stuff really cheap. I wanna go out to eat for dinner, or better yet- have a cook! Being poor sucks! I would like to know what it feels like to not worry about having money. To at least be comfortable. UUUUUUUUUUUUgh!!!!!

Don't Say Something Stupid!

My HuZzbend always says wrong things to me. This morning, we are in the kitchen being close. I tell him that I will miss him because he is leaving to visit a cousin and then to go to a concert later. He says,

"Maybe you'll like me better when I get back."


How stupid is that? Just as we are getting close and cuddly, he goes and says something to ruin it. It irritates me when he does that. Can't he just be sweet and tell me that he will miss me too? I love my HuZzbend. I don't get to see him much during the week. When we are at home, he's is always on the computer, and not paying attention to me. I would say more sweet things to him if he wouldn't say such stupid things to me. For somebody who's supposed to be so smart, he needs to think more before he says something. I need his attention and he needs to treat me sweetly. I'm fragile and sensitive and he knows it. Okay? That's all...

Inch High, Private Eye

My HuZzbend calls me "Inch High, Private Eye" when I am looking through his phone to see who has called. I have a right to know what women are calling him. He thinks that I'm just being nosy. I'm just being safe. He has too many women friends, and some of them have boobs and butt. He is a natural flirt and is very comfortable around women. They laugh at his retarded jokes, and smile at him. He says, "No one finds me attractive, but you."

How stupid does he think I am?

He's always meeting some woman or we run into some old friend of his. Of course, he says they never had sex. Come on! I will check his email. I will check his phone. I will keep checking up on his friends because I need to know if some bitch is trying to steal my man. Women don't care if a man is married; and men seem to end falling for some old girlfriend too easy. I'm the only girl friend he needs.

Who's afraid of the big, bad woof?

My HuZzbend tells me that I yell too much. I'm not yelling. He yells. He tries to get big and scary when he yells. I'm not yelling. I'm letting him know how I feel. I can be loud without yelling. My kids yell. They are always loud. It irritates me. They yell when they are right next to you. Then when you go to answer them, they always say, "Huh?" What's up with that? Why are they so loud? Can't they see how sensitive my little ear bones are? They irritate me.

My 17 year-old yelled at me tonight. She gets so worked up over nothing. She yells back about everything. Then she gets attitude with me. Then I yell. She irritates me sometimes. She needs to chill the f*** out!

When I talk to my HuZzbend, and he says something, if I don't hear him the first time- he yells it. Especially when we are on the phone. He says that I don't listen to him. I listen. Sometimes I get distracted. Sometimes he doesn't speak up. He doesn't have to yell at me. He irritates me when he does that. Doesn't he know how sensitive I am? He just needs to say it sweetly. They all do.

What am I supposed to blog about?

My HuZzbend has been telling me that I should blog. What the hell is blogging? It sounds like some problem that you have in the bathroom. Anyway, he set up this thing for me to do something with all the things that I worry about, since I don't like to talk. I don't know why he goes to all of this trouble because nobody is going to read this. But, oh well. I don't like to cry in front of my HuZzbend. He doesn't cry. He says that he used to be a big crybaby when he was little, and maybe he's all cried out. WHATEVER! I cry over money and not knowing what is going on. I cry when I feel overwhelmed at work and at home. I don't like crying in front of him because I don't want him to see me weak.

I don't like crying because my eyes get all puffy and my nose gets stuffy and I just bawl.

Is that spelled right? There's just so much going wrong in my life and it seems like every time things are going good, here we go again! I just need to know what's going on an that everything is getting done. That's all. Okay? Alright?